• reganland

Dentists are Cruel

Updated: Aug 27, 2019

Now before I even get started here, I want to make very clear that I love my dentist. I feel very fortunate to have her. She’s the best dentist I have ever had. I love her assistant and her tech as well. Not that there’s really anything for me to worry about at this point as I have not disclosed my name on this blog or really hardly anything that could identify me. And still, although I am really just getting started on this journey, I have not yet told a single soul what I’m doing. Not a single person on this planet that knows me knows about this blog as of this moment. So, yeah. No risk at this point. But as I have said before, I’m sure I won’t be remaining anonymous forever.

That said, there are some things about dentists that really blow my mind. One of my favorites is after they are done with their initial exam of you, they almost always seem to say, to me at least, “well it looks like I’m getting just a little bit of bleeding here…” To which I reply solely in my mind without vocalizing the thought, “that’s probably because I don’t have a major habit of shoving sharp metal objects down the sides of my teeth and into my gums. Maybe if I did this on a regular basis, you wouldn’t experience bleeding when you are doing it to me.”

And then you get the lecture about flossing. And then they tell you exactly which areas are in the worst condition and that they’re going to do “a real good job” of cleaning those areas out. Oh, great. So the parts of my face that are currently in the most pain, you are about to go to town on. That sounds like such a stellar idea! I’m so glad I came here today to your little torture chamber! And then, as if that’s not enough, as soon as they’re done inflicting this particular type of pain on you, they will immediately spray your gums down with ice cold water. How soothing!

Remember that lecture on flossing that you just got? Well, now it’s time for HER to floss. So much for that whole lecture about carefully going up and down the sides of each tooth. I don’t know about you, but most of my teeth are extremely close together. And the one thing that I personally never do when I am doing my own flossing is to simply pull the strand of floss taut between two teeth and pull down on it until the floss explodes into the gap between my teeth with the force of a holiday presale mob blasting through the front doors of a Walmart. And then, after this explosive entry has been accomplished, extremely quickly and with absolutely no attention to accuracy, blindly wiggle the strand around a couple of times before yanking it out from between this particular pair of teeth only to repeat the process until it feels like I’ve just eaten a porcupine.

Not only do I actually walk into this place of my own free will, I actually pay these people to do this to me. Unbelievable!

Alright. So that was a little bit of exaggeration for effect. A little embellishment for the sake of Theater of The Mind as some would call it. A technique frequently used in comedy. Yes, I was trying to be funny there. Hopefully it worked. As I said at the top of this post, I actually have a wonderful dentist and I’m treated very well by her and her staff. Although I could be taking a little bit better care of my teeth, I do a good enough job that I’m not glared at, stared at or sighed at when I visit my dentist.

The best thing about my dentist? I trust her. And although these days it’s pretty rare that I need such services, but if I’m ever going to have somebody all up in my craw with the drills and needles and things, I better be able to trust them.

The most valuable thing that you can ever give to someone, or receive from someone, is trust. Because if you don’t have trust in a relationship, you don’t have anything.

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